Miss Informed

Boo-Hoo...

I suppose I was getting spoiled at the Dr.'s office when at the beginning I was getting an ultrasound every time I went in. On Monday, we went in for a routine appointment, and much to my disappointment, they put me in a "regular" room (with no fancy equipment.) When it finally sunk in that they would not be transferring me once another room became available, I asked why I wouldn't be getting an ultrasound. My Dr. said that they only do that from this point on if there is an "issue". I could see Charley staring at me from the corner and he knew what I was thinking. In his eyes, he was trying to tell me "don't even think about making up a problem just to get an ultrasound." Pfff, like I would stoop that low I thought, while also trying desperately to remember any of the names of the conditions you can develop during pregnancy.

Then I tried to bargain with the Dr. She informed me that I wouldn't be getting another ultrasound until 20 weeks. Doing the quick math, I pointed out that if she sees me every 4 weeks, she would see me at 18, could I have it then? No? Ok, well then can I come at 18 and then again at 20? Yes! I finally wore her down! So, no news on the gender front until the end of January.

Here is a recent description of baby Jacob's development:

Your Baby

Rapid growth of your baby continues at this point. The skin is very thin and you can see the blood vessels clearly underneath. The scalp hair pattern is developing while fine hair (called lanugo) covers the baby's body. Your baby is approximately 12-14 cm (3.7 to 4.1 inches) and weighs about 50 grams (1.75 to 2 ounces).

Your baby's taste buds already look like a mature adult's and doctors have learned that the amniotic fluid that surrounds it can smell strongly of curry, cumin, garlic, onion and other essences from a mother's diet. Your baby's bones continue to harden and retain calcium very rapidly. At this point in the pregnancy the placenta will begin to take on the job of hormone production to sustain the pregnancy, which was the job of your ovaries up to this point. Your baby's eyelids are now firmly shut, and will stay closed until the third trimester.

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh 2/3 Christmas Tree

What does this story have to do with the baby you ask? Nothing. What does it have to do with this blog? A very good example of pregnancy hormones at work coupled with the ingrained differences between man and woman.

The story goes like this...

Charley's first mistake occurred during the Christmas season of 2006, when he decided to try to be helpful by going to the Christmas tree lot and picking out a tree by himself in order to save me the hassle. What a nice guy you might be thinking. Until I force you to conjure up images of the tree in the Charlie Brown Christmas and you start to get the picture of what this tree looked like. How do you put 642 ornaments on a tree that has 7 branches?

This year, however, he was smart enough to take me to the lot of my choice, allow me to unwrap as many trees as I saw fit, and without much complaint, allowed me to select the 8 foot tree that was accidentally marked 7 feet so I could feel like I got a bargain. Take that tree farm!

Again, what a nice guy you might be thinking. However, his second mistake occurred when he decided to put the tree up while I was working late one night. In his male mind, he clearly could not see how a tree with a 5 foot diameter could fit into the corner I designated. What would I have done you ask? Easy. I would have had him move the 350 pound dining room table into the garage or some other room so as to clearly ensure that the tree stood prominently as the centerpiece of the dining room. Furniture or other "accessories" come second to the splendor of the tree. What did he do? He chose to take the tree outside and lob off all of the branches on one side of the tree so they were not more than a foot long and could be squeezed into a corner. Hence, we now have 2/3 of a tree.

Now is the point of the story where the pregnancy hormones kick in. "You've maimed my tree and ruined Christmas," I yell as I storm up the stairs. To which he quietly replies "What would you have liked me to do?" Why it's not obvious to him I don't quite know, but clearly, the sensible thing at the time would be to hack our dining room table into kindling in order to light the fire that has gone out which is now making me cold, thus leaving ample room for the tree to be displayed in all its glory. Oh, and do we have anything that you could use to make the tree rotate 360 degrees?

Oh, and I also don't appreciate the people who I tell this story to who seem to think that Charley is "on to something" and should market corner trees. Will you please look at the bottom of this tree and tell me it looks normal?

Ok,

My mother read my blog and called immedietly to say that I better be careful about what I put down in writing because she doesn't want me to regard this as a negative experience. Darn! I hate when she is right! All in all, it really hasn't been that bad, it just makes for a more exciting read than "nothing of any significance happened today."

So instead of describing what 2 glasses of milk coming back up looks like at 6 am in the morning, I will focus on the joys of maternity pants. If you don't own a pair, I would highly suggest you all run out and buy a pair, even if you are not expecting. I call them "buffett" pants, because I can clearly tell how gaining weight in these is going to be easy! They come with a 6 inch panel of expandable fabric that would have been great for anyone at the Thanksgiving table.

I am considering giving them as a Christmas gift, and trust me, if you are the recipient, you will thank me later!

Oh... I suppose I forgot the most important part after my recent rant...

At 12 weeks:

Even though your little Einstein’s body is still growing quite rapidly, 2 inches long right now, the overall super-speedy growth of their amazing brain continues to leave the head proportionately larger than the body— and is actually slightly more than one third of their total body mass! The head and neck are still straightening at this point as can be seen by their little chin lifting off of the chest. Your baby is also actively rehearsing “breathing” by using amniotic fluid to prepare the lungs for future air respiration.

Week 12

Hello week 12!

I have a smallish issue that I would like to complain about this week. For anyone who plans on having children in the future, do not, I repeat, DO NOT read the books about "what to expect." The only outcome that could possibly result from this is either 1) you feel NOT normal or 2) It scares you Let me give you a few examples...

I read this one this afternoon, and I quote:

"By week 12, you may not have gained any weight yet..."

What??? Are they kidding? How about 9 pounds?

Here's some more stellar advice....

"Pregnant woman may have cravings for non-food substances such as rocks, laundry soap, and clay. Women who are experiencing this should talk to their doctors..."

Are these people for real? Rest assured, if I ever feel like putting a bar of soap or some rocks in my mouth, I will speak with my doctor first.

I also appreciate the...

"early pregnancy symptoms, such as morning sickness, cravings, and headaches, should have just about disappeared by the 12th week."

Really? Then perhaps you can explain to my husband why we had to go to the store for salt and vinegar potato chips. Not just any brand, mind you, but the purple bag from the dirty potato chip company. Oh, and I am writing this while dry-heaving.

I hope this didn't sound angry, I just think the books should be a little more realistic. I could some up a 500 page book in one sentence...

No two pregnancies are the same, so don't go reading books that tell you how you should and should not feel.